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froggie_girlkel wants me to rant about neo-knitters:

Jesus fucking Christ – have you seen these people? They are EVERYWHERE, knitting their little scarves or hats or ipod caddies. I mean really, what the hell? It’s blatantly saying “I’m too cool for your store bought sweaters. I make my OWN, bitches!” It’s worse in bookstores where these little cliques of neo-knitters sit in huddles with their large satchels of yarn (“This yarn came from sheep only raised on the north side of a mountain in Ireland.” “Yeah? Well mine is heirloom yarn brought over with my nanny from Russia!”) and their scarves end up getting EVERYWHERE, like down the romance novel section into scifi/fantasy and down around fiction. I don’t know what I hate more about them, their pretentious attitude when it comes to their “craft” or the fact that they can knit and thereby just rub their skills into my non-knitting face. “Oh what? You can’t perl? HAHA YOU SUCK!” But really – who are they emulating in the end? Little old spinsters with a billion cats and no love life. That’s who. So pack up your yarn culture and take a hike you rapers of sheep, goats and rabbits!
 
 
 
 
 
 
Yeah! *Shakes fist wildly* =) Beautifully done!
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actually, I may have spelled that wrong, but perl is a type of knitting stitch. IT's like the inverse of a regular knit.

Sorry - this girl is not a programmer, I just help them find jobs :-P
Yeah, it's actually spelled purl. But no worries. :)
But purling makes it look pretty. Really. Don't be made at the purlers.
Whahahaha!!! That was awesome. And it's funny because it's true.
I was knitting before knitting was cool, and I never did it in public.

I'm so old skool *gangsta pose*
There was a little neo-knitters group at LoveCafe the night of Fray Day having their stitch(es)-and-bitch(es) session. They were SO LOUD we couldn't hear the Fray Day speakers who were using a MICROPHONE.

Damn them. Damn them and their skeins of variegated yarn.

--Tiff
Hahaha, I had no idea. Knitted ipod caddies? Sheesh!
As someone who has absolutely no adversity to neo-knitters, even thinks they're kinda cool (even though I don't know the first thing about knitting), I gotta say...

that was fucking hilarious! Well done. -)
Honestly, before Kelly told me about this knitting thing, I had never heard about it. It just made me stop and think: "So, you're rebelling against your culture that for some umpteen decades actually said women should ONLY knit and sew, etc. BY actually knitting?! WTF, people?" I swear, this country just needs one gigantic Fight Club to take out their misguided rage.