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No one should ever say that an animal means nothing.

I just got off the phone with my parents. My cat Smokey, whom I got when I was in the second grade, has not been doing very well. She's been at the vet since thursday. She wasn't eating anything, she wasn't grooming and wouldn't let the vets open her mouth. She was very dehydrated too.

By the weekend the vets had her hydrated and on antibotics. They had found her right lung filled with fluid which is a sign of bactiral pnemonia. They though that she also might have an absess behind her eye that was also bactirial so they waited until she was stable enough to give her a head x-ray.

Today we got the news that it's a brain tumor behind her eye causing her pain to the point where she can't eat anything. If she wasn't 16 years old, we might take her to the cancer clinic at the Vet school at UCD. But even then we don't know if it would do any good for her.

My parents called me to discuss with me what would happen. We have decided to put her down. For me, the most painful thing is that I can't be there, I can't hold her, and I can't tell her what a good pet she has been to me. I haven't seen her for over a year. I can only hope that she remembers me.

I know that this is the right thing to do. I really wish that it would be possible to bring her home and let her go in a famialr place with familiar smells. However, if we did bring her home she would simply starve to death, and that is no way to go. Also, it's been hard for her at home. My parents j got a new kitten a few months ago and Smokey has not taken well to little Mikey. I think that her being at the vets, with my mom and dad there holding her someplace quiet and peaceful would be the best way for her to go.

Now I'm crying so hard it's hard to type.

But Smokey was a good cat. She was a huntress of the finest class. She would leave us half eaten mice by our door, and then throw the other half up on your porch. She was quiet too - never made a sound except for squeaks. We used to joke that after all, you are what you eat. She was graceful and agile and was spooked by anything - your foot twitching, your arm moving, throwing a sock at her from 20 ft above. She was also the softest cat ever.

When I was in 12th grade I had my wisdom teeth taken out. Smokey slept on the pillows by my head for the full day that I was home from school. I was pretty drugged up but I knew that she was there.

I have been very lucky to have Smokey in my life. She was never very sick and only got into a few cat fights that required going to the vet. She put up with me amazingly well, and put up with Marble even better. She was the typical middle cat, like a typical middle child.

I will miss her very very much. She used to wait for me to come home from school. I know that things will be better for her.

St. Peter was up at the pearly gates when a group of mice came to him and asked if they were allowed in Heaven. St. Peter looked down and said of course! All of God's creatures are allowed in Heaven. He gave them their wings and their little halos. The Mice went off and soon came back. "Heaven is so big and our feet are so tiny, we can't see it all!" So St. Peter gave the little mice roller skates so they could see the sites of Heaven.

A few minutes later a group of cats came to the gates and asked if they were allowed in Heaven. St Peter told the cats what he told the mice, and gave them their halos and wings. A few minutes later he saw one of the cats and asked him how things were going.

"Great" said the cat. "And I love the fact that you have meals on wheels!"

I love you lots, Smokey. I was so lucky to have you in my life.
I'm so sorry. I am crying right along with you, if you can believe thet. After recently putting my sweet cat Boo down because of Feluke, I understand and sympethyze. And I believe Smokey knows what joy she brought to you. Cats are not that humble!

I am spending the evening getting to know the two new bobtail cats I just adopted from the shelter. So far they seem to be doing well. I hope that the space left in your heart by Smokey is soon filled with love too.
Make that 'sympathize'. *shakes head* It's been a long day. :-)
heh, I understand :) I hope that your two bobtails bring you love. I have been hugging my kitty Sasha who I got last November and telling him stories about Smokey and also how lucky I am to have a kitty in my life.

My parents are sending me pictures of Smokey so that I will have some happy photos to remind me about her. It will be hard to look through them, but I'll be glad to have them.
I know exactly what you're going thru. . ..growing up, I had a cat named Sebastian. He was a huge Tom Cat. . .had a half goatee going on one side of his face and was just a beautiful black and white cat. Everyone in their life has "their" animal; the kind that you just have some sort of psycho-kinetic bond. They are always there for you, when u were down they're there to be your buddy. It's like a best friend, except small and fuzzy.

You want to know the best part of Sebastian?

He was a real rat bastard to EVERYONE and EVERYTHING that wasn't me. He kicked the shit out of dogs, our other cats, and was a mouse killer like no other. He was also my buddy. He feel asleep at my feet, woke me up in the morning, and was there to greet me when I got home. Then one day he started getting a wierd lump on his face.

Sebastian was diagnosed with mouth cancer in March of 1994. It took his life 7 months later, at the end of October. During those 7 months, I woke up early every morning to spend time with him. That was over 10 years ago, and I still miss that little 20 lbs, 20 inch long fuzzball like you wouldn't believe. I'm actually tearing up remembering him.

He used to beat up our other cat, Samantha, like no one's business. She used to turn her head away whenever she walked by him, and one day she did and he did nothing. So, a couple steps after passing him by, she starts strutting as I believe she thought she had won a moral victory. Well, not for too long as he chased her down and just beat the piss out of her.

I loved that cat. It's hard, and no other animals will ever replace Smokey, but it's memories like that that still make me smile. I forgot watching him in pain for 1/2 a year, watching that lump swell, feeling horrible for a year or so after we got a new cat to "replace" him when all it did was get rid of my cat for some foreign one and make me feel worse as my parents thought a new cat would make me forget about my special buddy.

All that negative just kind of washes away when I remember him beating the shit out of samantha, or staring down Samson (when he was a puppy) like a a cat without fear, or his penchant for crawling in the middle of my piles of clean clothes and sleeping in them, or how he liked being walked on a leash. . . . .shit, I'm getting all wheepy like a a little bitch with a skinned knee and shit.

I feel ur pain. . . .
Thank you, Kubryk, for sharing that with me. Sabastian reminds me a lot of one of our other cats who passed when I was in high school. This guy was one surly son of a bitch. He chased a rottweiler out of our back yard once.

Pets are special, and I'm glad you could tell me about Sabastion.
Sebastian was a special cat.

Tho if u mention i was tearing up, me and you are gonna have to tangle :-p
Duke was born 6 months after me. He was MY dog. But we put him down when he was 15. I'm sorry sweetie. I love you so much and I wish there was something I could do to make it better. ::hugs and more hugs::
*hugs* It's never easy losing a pet. Especially one that you've had that long.
I'm so sorry, darling. My puppy - well, she was almost ten - started getting sick last February. The vet didn't know what was wrong, and, almost every day, we brought her to him. The night before she passed, she was crying so badly that my mother and I powdered up some baby asprin and dripped it into her mouth. I was so shaken, that I started researching.. and found the disease right away. Extremely common in her breed - I was amazed the vet didn't realize sooner. I called that night, made an appointment for the next morning, when they opened, to get her uterus taken out [baterial infection; it was swelling, and bound to explode. Sort of like appendixitus in humans]. At eight-thirty, I checked on her, went out, started the car, got it warm and comfy, brought out her favorite blanket, and went back inside to check on her. In the five minutes, she passed. On the carpet next to my bed. Needless to say, I was devestated. I broke things. I made holes in walls. I destroyed. I called, screaming at my vet - why didn't he know better? I found out what it was after three minutes of searching the web. My father came home, and we buried her in the backyard. It's sort of funny, I'm still bitter towards that vet - he had three months to figure it out, I did it in three minutes - but I suppose that's the way life goes. But, in repast, I'm glad that she passed where she was happy. She used to cuddle up with my at nights, ever since she was a puppy. Sweetest dog I've ever known. So sweet, that I've erected a shrine for her above her resting place in the yard - a bubbling fountain, rose bushes, glittery rocks with cute titles like "Friends Forever" "My Inspiration" and so on.

All we can do is hold the memories close - playing with her in the evening, petting her as she falls asleep on your lap - that sort of thing. They bring comfort, and the knowledge that, whatever the age, they lived a full, happy life because of what you gave them - love.

I'm so sorry to hear about Smokey. A few years ago the weird little stray kitty, Sushi, that I had taken in got nasal lymphoma. It was devastating. In the end we had to have him put to sleep, because the tumor came back, and he stopped eating and grooming, and looked like he was in so much pain. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. And this was a cat that had only been in my life for about two years, so I can't imagine how hard it would be to go through the same thing with a childhood pet.

You'll be in my thoughts.
Oh man, I so sorry you lost your cat. That shit is so painful. I hope you feel better soon.

Losing a pet is so painful...they are part of the family.