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amerikanpatriot would like me to speak a bit on a subject I bet most of you were thinking about two days ago. People who post multiple things in a row clogging up your friends page.
YOU SUCK YOU SUCK YOU SUCK! Do you know what I hate? What I really FUCKING HATE? I hate it when I click on my flist, expecting to fulfill my voyeuristic needs for the day and all I see are craptastic posts by one person. HELLO PEOPLE – DON’T BE AN LJ HOG! And what’s worse is if they are all quizzes! NOTHING BUT QUIZZES!! What – do you think I WANT to see the fact that some 14 year old twerp who knows how to use quizilla has dubbed you an “artistic soul?” or some other quiz says that you’re “strong but a good friend” and shit like that?!? WHO NEEDS AN INTERNET QUIZ TO TELL THEM WHO THEY ARE?!?! And they only post the GOOD ones – you’re never going to see a quiz result that says “you have no personality and you suck. You’re a leach and loser.” Instead, I have to go down my flist for 20 entries because people decide that they need the world to see how special and unique they are. OH! AND RANTS!! I FUCKING HATE THE RANTS PEOPLE FLOOD MY FLIST WITH!! Jesus Christ people – here is what you do: Consolidate all your quiz results or rants into one entry. THEN FUCKING USE AN LJ-CUT!! YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL! NO ONE LIKES YOU AND YOU’RE TAKING UP VALUABLE SPACE ON THE INTERNET!!!

americanpatriot would also like me to say this to all smokers out there:
You suck and I hate you. I hope you all die of lung cancer. Stop smoking near me and stop being all “smoking is fucking cool. And you’re not.” If you smokers out there don’t stop – there will be bloodshed. Be a doll and quit smoking or else I will hunt you all down with a spoon. A SPOON I SAY!

iideliishii would like me to talk about my “love” of mouse pads.
Whoever invented mouse pads needs to be dragged out into the street and shot. Multiple times. In the gonads. But before that they need to be forced to sit in the crappy non-smoking seats. And before that they need to be surrounded by smokers who laugh at them because they don’t smoke. But in the end, this person needs to be hurt. Mouse Pads are evil in carnate. They say they follow your finger, but no – they only follow it SOMETIMES. And have you tried to do anything artistic with a mouse pad? Yeah, NOT GONNA HAPPEN. Seriously – to the guy who invented mouse pads (which sound like a sanitary device for rodents) – I got your number buddy.

miesl brings up a very good rant. There are not enough hours of the day for sleep.
I don’t want to work. All I want to do is sleep. All day every day. Sleep. I’m envious of those coma people because all they ever do is sleep. Really, nothing is wrong with them, they are just REALLY REALLY REALLY tired. Lucky fucking bastards. As for the rest of us, we have to juggle juggle juggle away with our hours so that we can try to get just five more minutes of precious delicious sleep in. Personally – I think we should get rid of Tuesday and then use those hours and evenly distribute them over the 6 other days. Maybe give Saturday and Sunday a few extra. But wouldn’t that make EVERYBODY happier? Just to have a few more hours to SLEEP IN?

bark2themoon has asked me for two rants. First up – internet speak (or shorthand).
FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY YOU FUCKERS – LEARN TO TYPE!! You are not cool and you are not savvy when you type out “omg u r teh shitz” or some crap like that. First off – I was typing “teh” long before alls yall because one hand types faster than the other. I stopped doing this because I realized how stupid it made me look. LEARN THAT LESSON MOTHER FUCKERS! Also – l337 5p34k. Okay – this is only funny if you are using it to mock everybody else. It is NOT okay to ever use this in real life. Never ever. No one will respect what you say. This brings me to my next point. LEARN TO FUCKING USE THE SHIFT KEY YOU MOTHER FUCKING LAZY ASS BITCHES! The best icon I’ve even seen said the following: “hello. i am ee cummings. only *i* may speak like this. the rest of you bitches need to learn to use the fucking shift key.” You may think it makes you look cool to not use the shift key, but really – in the end it makes you seem like a lazy ass punk with no regards to the English language. Not using capitals does not make you special, it makes you fucking lame and pretentious. Now, there are some acronyms that are acceptable if used sparingly simply because they have become slang. LOL, OMG, WTF, AFK, and DMMFHY (okay, not true on the last one). W00t is also acceptable. Everything else – don’t use it or you will get cosmically bitch slapped. By me. And ee cummings.

bark2themoon also would also like me to spew a bit on how native Minnesotans bitch about the cold.

There – no more rants. We are all done. I’m sorry that it clogged up everybody’s flist. I really didn’t think this meme would take off like it did, and I am really surprised you guys wanted me to rant about things so much.

Would it be worth it to set up another LJ entitled “Meg’s Blog of Angsty Rants”? It would be run how this meme was run with a few differences. On Monday I would take suggestions for rants and I would then post 2 a day through out the week. If I get more than 8 rant suggestions, I get to pick and choose which rants to use. It would repeat weekly.

What do you guys think?
Dude, I would totally read your rant page. Seriously. I have so many ideas for rants you would pass out. I LOVED the one about shorthand. I HATE PEOPLE WHO USE IT. And by the way, what does 'teh' mean?
I have a sick feeling it's either a lazy-assed way of saying "the" b/c people don't want to check their own spelling, or maybe it's something worse.
"teh" is what happens when one hand types faster than the other why trying to type "the." Now it's become a way to emphasis a word. Or something.

I may put together a rant blog - but you'd have to help by giving me things to rant about :)
I will now attempt to explain "leet speak."

We'll start simple. "teh" started as a way to make fun of people who think theyre leet but cant spell. Unfortunately, these people did not catch the sarcasm, decided it was "k00l" and started using it themselves. This applies to almost all purposely misspelled worts in "leet" Even the word leet stems from some moron who couldnt spell enough to inform the Sysop (elite hackers and subsequently hacker police origionally hired by mIRC but now a staple in the MSN community) crew that he was an elite hacker so they should let him join.

Things like "4"s in place of "A"s... well... when you play a game like Half Life online they have profanity blockers that will not allow you to offend anyone. These can be bypassed by calling someone g4y (or ghey, but that one is easier to block). Similarly you can say $h!t and easily slip shit into any sentence. teh 1337 1!7713 |
leet is usually atributed to hackers and people who do online gaming.

As I said - it's okay to use leet when you are not being serious. Use it in mocking terms only. However, some people don't. Also - go take a look at a middle school kid's blog. Odds are this is what you will see:

yeah i am bck home. again. LOL LOL LOL omg therez this kewl guy in my fr clss. i wanna...you know...LOL LOL LOL okay lalalala gtg see yaaaaz LOL

What worse is when you see this is a 19 or 20 year old's journal.
Damn right. I love ranting.
Seriously – to the guy who invented mouse pads (which sound like a sanitary device for rodents) – I got your number buddy.

Ooooh, can I have it? My comp at work is giving me grief!
Meg rantage is fun! I would love to read more.