me: blech blech!
him: and in other news, johnnie depp bought an island
me: maybe it has a lot of rum on it
me: and he and I could get stranded there
me: and drink the rum.
me: and he'd put the moves on me
him: with his wife and kids
me: then pass out
me: and I'd burn the rum
me: and his wife and kids
him: but why is my family gone?